guilt is a terrible conscience. what have i advocate? what karma have i achieved? beliving in personal freedom and choice in a society teaching confucian value is like a bird caged. then if free will is used as freely as the name suggests than why do we still bind ourselves with the weights of moral and civic reponsibilities. I cannot shoulder what i cannot undone, i am in no position why then do i try to be heroic?

at this time tonight, it is tearing me up. my guilt on telling the truth. my guilt on not supporting the seemingly right of way. my guilt on causing an indirect and unfair hurt to an undeserving party.

my guilt and wrong. i should maintain silence.